My mom always told me “you don’t actually know anything until you’re in your 40’s.” Then she turned 50 and has since said, “you don’t actually know anything until you’re in your 50’s.” Reading between the lines (and the Moscow Mule in her hand), I have come to understand that what she really means is that, for most of us, it takes a lifetime to develop a true understanding of the lessons we’re meant to learn…and then to actually put those lessons into practice. We spend so much of our lives filled with worry and doubt, chasing this and that, we don’t actually get to feeling good about the life we’re living until…well, apparently…our 50s?
Since I’ve got such a wise mother who has a head start on mastering life’s lessons, I have made the conscious decision to learn the lessons early. To open my eyes. To pay attention. To make intentional choices that will enable me to live a life that feels good…now. I mean, the sooner we get started in practicing habits that help us thrive, the longer we actually get to enjoy the fruits of our labor.
Through plenty of trial and error, I have boiled a feel good life down to three key elements. Three elements that when mixed with energy, awareness and a lot of water, put you straight on the path to a life you’re excited to live.
Three ingredients to a life that feels good:
1. Cultivate. Our lives are pretty much a set of lines that we get to mold into whatever shape we’d like. We get to draw the boundaries of our comfort zones…and then redraw them over and over again. Cultivating a feel good life is about creating new experiences, expanding our horizons and investing time and energy in the things that make us excited to get up in the morning. It might be practicing a new hobby, planning a weekend getaway or developing a morning routine that gets you pumped for the day. You are the architect of your life. Design the life you want to live…and get to living it.
2. Nourish. If you want to grow rice, you plant rice. If you want to grow apples, you plant apples. If you want to grow joy…guess what? You’ve got to plant it. In order to live a feel good life, we first have to start by nourishing the elements in our lives that fuel us to feel good. Simple as that. Nourish YOURSELF. Practice self-care. Eat clean foods that make you feel strong. Take the bubble bath. Read books that call to your curiosity. Give into compassion but also learn when to say enough is enough. The areas in your life you give the most attention to are the ones that will thrive. It’s up to you to decide if you’re growing flowers or weeds.
3. Move. To quote the prodigious Elle Woods: Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t kill their husbands. You just cant argue with that. Sweating it out for even 15 minutes a day has a long lasting feel good effect. It gives your body (and mind) the strength it needs to do all that you ask of it. Exercise is active meditation, a gesture of gratitude, self love and an act of power all at once. The more we move, the stronger we are to roll with life’s punches. The stronger we feel, the more capable we are to lift those around us. Take the walk, go to the dance class, sign up for the marathon. Make the time to move. You (and everyone around you) will thank you for it.
Living a feel good life doesn’t mean that you are bursting at the seams with joy from sunrise to sunset. It means that you are actively creating a life you love to live. It’s about building an environment that brings you joy and arming yourself with the tools you need for when things aren’t so sunny. By cultivating new experiences, developing positive habits and nourishing our own well-being, we put the power back in our own hands to decide what kind of life we want to live. I don’t know about you, but I want to live a life that feels damn good. Right now.
If you don’t know where to get started or what path to take, reach out. Let’s build your feel good life together.